The First Free Agency Action of the Offseason

Chad Alexander, seen about to plunk a child in the head with a ball.

Okay, so this actually happened back in... August? The end of the summer? I figured it's now appropriate to go ahead and formally announce the signing of former Rough Rider and Dodger, as well as now two-time champeen, Blaine Milam by Chad Alexander of the forever-drunken Swamp Donkeys. Here it is, from the angry Irishman's mouth itself (I figure calling him a true leprechaun just isn't very nice):

"After months of negotiations the Swamp Donkeys are announcing the signing of a big time free agent to the roster: Blaine Milam has just signed a contract to play for the Swamp Donkeys in the 2013 season. Blaine will bring to the Stinkies some much needed pitching depth and their first ever switch-hitter. The recent World Series MVP and perrenial All-Star did not come cheap, although I cannot discuss contract specifics. I just hope Chuck isnt too sore and everything heals up soon. There are more negotiations under way but cannot be discussed until a job decision is made.

Chad
GM Swamp Donkeys"